Category Archives: My funny husband

Good times with the husband

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Hubs and I got separated at Walmart. When we found each other again, we both had on a giant bear head hat.

brown bear head

We’d come across the display separately, weighed the pros and cons of “who knows who’s had their head in this thing” vs. “gosh, it would be funny” and decided funny won. We saw each other, froze, and immediately cracked up. Read the rest of this entry

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Monitoring the Monitor

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Through the baby monitor, my husband and I heard Joseph wake up. I went to get him and said, “So, Joseph, what do you think of Daddy? He’s kind of funny looking, huh? But don’t worry. You get to leave when you’re 18. I’m stuck with him for life!”

My husband pushed the talk button on the receiving end Read the rest of this entry

Have I mentioned my husband is funny?

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While lying in bed, exhausted, nauseous, and useless this first trimester, I said to my husband, “You know how in the movies when a woman is in labor she’s screaming, crushing her husband’s fingers and shouting, ‘You did this to me!'”

“Yes,” he replied with a healthy amount of caution.

“Just in case I’m too busy or I forget, I’ll say it now: You did this to me!”

He said, Read the rest of this entry

Momma kitty

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My youngest loves cats and kittens. A recent visit to the library netted her this book, which became our bedtime “story.”

cat

Ridiculously cute, am I right?

For kicks and giggles, I was subtly adding words in my “reading voice.”

For instance (not a direct quote from the book): “Cats are fun and playful just like Momma.”

“Cats are beautiful and smart just like Momma.”

Then my husband walks in and says, Read the rest of this entry

Not rooting for Wilbur

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That's soooome pig!

That’s soooome pig!

I’m reading Charlotte’s Web to my girls. We are currently at the part at the fair where Wilbur is, as always, worried that he’ll be killed. Charlotte assures him he will win a ribbon and won’t be killed. Nice, right?

So, at dinner, my four-year-old takes a bite of meat and says, “Mmmm… Yum-my! This tastes like DEAD PIG!”

Sigh. Then later I asked if she’d like some carrots. She said, “Yes, please, and more dead pig!”

Good grief. I’m not placing money on her becoming a vegetarian.

Since Nikitaland asked for funny stories about my husband, here’s a bonus for you: Read the rest of this entry