My sweet, darling, adorable red-headed six-year-old, E, never ceases to astound me. But not always for good reason.
Here’s an exchange between her and her older sister, L, while they stirred up strawberry jello.
E: It’s blood.
L: No, it’s a flood.
E: It’s a flood of blood.
L: No, it’s a strawberry flood.
E: It’s a flood of strawberry blood.
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I just came across this facebook post of mine from a couple years ago. It still cracks me up so I thought I’d share:
Phonics and spelling assessment for one child + math unit review for another = Momma gets to have a little a-d-d-i-t-i-o-n to her lemonade today!
= temporary relief from insanity
Remember, faithful readers, when my oldest came up with a handy excuse for her spelling mistakes, ala “a letter was missing because it wasn’t invited to the word party,” or the quotation marks were so low because “they had rocks in their boots”?
The latest came when the printer was running low on ink and the bottom halves of a few lines were faint to non-existent. My daughter said Read the rest of this entry
Whilst caressing my cheek and speaking in a sweet voice, my daughter said, “Mommy, I really don’t like you. I like daddy.”
And someone else sent me this nugget: Read the rest of this entry
Anyone who spends a significant amount of time with a toddler can appreciate the joy that a few minutes of privacy can bring. Toddlers are with you always, with an endless stream of questions, many of which have obvious answers and didn’t need to be asked in the first place.
I had one of those days with my son, so when I went to the bathroom, I locked the door. I just wanted to tinkle in peace. But no sooner had I sat down when I heard the familiar: “Mommy, where are you?” followed by my son’s desperate attempt to open the door. I was so frustrated I couldn’t stand it. So when my son asked, “What you doing?” I replied, Read the rest of this entry
My seven-year-old was reading about owls out loud, including what they eat. My four-year-old said to me, “So if an owl saw a human it would be like, [shrugs shoulders] ‘Umm. Nah.'”
Where does she come up with this stuff?
A friend posted this on facebook. My heart nearly melted:
Two of my children were chatting in the backyard sandbox. One said to the other, Read the rest of this entry
Getting dressed in the morning in my home doesn’t always happen. The rule is, you must be dressed by lunch, and if the kids are okay with a late lunch then….
Not being a great role model in this regard–I mean, why bother taking off the clothes you’ll just be putting back on in a few hours, am I right?–I tried one day to be better.
“Let’s see who can get dressed first!” I called to my girls enthusiastically.
“I’m halfway there!” I soon announced from my room.
“One more arm hole to go!”
Then, triumphantly, I stood in their bedroom doorway, arms raised, announcing, “I win!”
My half-dressed youngest said disdainfully, Read the rest of this entry
Hey, you’re a Phil, too?
We had friends over for a game night recently. One of our guests was Phil. He relayed a story of having met the San Diego Chargers’ quarterback Philip Rivers… for the second time. You see, he had met this preeminently famous San Diegan once before and, on the second meeting, forgot. his. name. Mind you, this friend’s name is Phil. The quarterback’s name is Phil-ip. You’d think that would be memorable to a Phil, right? But not only, on his second meeting, did he ASK PHILIP RIVERS HIS NAME!!!!! But then he asked, Read the rest of this entry