Tag Archives: embarrassing kid stories

Hamster juice

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At my daughter’s birthday party, we discussed cake decorating.

In honor of my daughter’s best birthday present, someone said, “You could just put the hamster on the cake.”

E, my youngest, said, “Then you might get hamster juice on it.” After a long pause, she added, “That’s hamster pee.”

“Yes, we got it. Thank you,” I said to her.

Somehow that spurred her onward instead of silencing her. Read the rest of this entry

Whose kid is this?!

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My sweet, darling, adorable red-headed six-year-old, E, never ceases to astound me. But not always for good reason.

Here’s an exchange between her and her older sister, L, while they stirred up strawberry jello.

E: It’s blood.
L: No, it’s a flood.
E: It’s a flood of blood.
L: No, it’s a strawberry flood.
E: It’s a flood of strawberry blood.
Read the rest of this entry

Forget I asked

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A friend in Florida texted me this story:

I put on my knee-length dress before realizing I hadn’t shaved my legs. It was far too hot to wear hose, so I asked my young daughter if she could see the short prickly hairs, hoping I could get away without shaving.

She said, “Yes, Mommy, but Read the rest of this entry

Have we met?

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Hey, you're a Phil, too?

Hey, you’re a Phil, too?

We had friends over for a game night recently. One of our guests was Phil. He relayed a story of having met the San Diego Chargers’ quarterback Philip Rivers… for the second time. You see, he had met this preeminently famous San Diegan once before and, on the second meeting, forgot. his. name. Mind you, this friend’s name is Phil. The quarterback’s name is Phil-ip. You’d think that would be memorable to a Phil, right? But not only, on his second meeting, did he ASK PHILIP RIVERS HIS NAME!!!!! But then he asked, Read the rest of this entry

You know you’re at the end of a pregnancy when

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A pregnant woman

Your five-year-old tells you not to sit in a chair “because you might break it.”

Thanks, honey!

~Kim, mother of 4

Kim adds, “In his defense, I Read the rest of this entry

My little lady

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For no other reason, I suppose, than because she could, my adorable three-year-old stood up on her chair during dinner, lifted her dress above her head and yelled, Read the rest of this entry

You know I have good friends when…

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they’re willing to send me stories like this!

English: An used toilet paper roll Português: ...

English: An used toilet paper roll Português: Um rolo acabado de papel higiênico. (Photo credit: Wikipedia) There’s your Portugese lesson for the day. I just can’t get over why someone would take a picture of this. And why would wikipedia want it?

I was in the bathroom taking care of business while my two children milled around on the floor of the bathroom and my bedroom. Upon finishing, I came to the awful realization that not only was I left with an empty roll of TP, but there were no extra rolls in the bathroom either!

The only help I had were a nearly three-year-old and a 10-month-old.  Read the rest of this entry