I think I’ll walk down a different aisle.

I’ll take the stripey ones on bottom, if you don’t mind.

My daughter was helping me shop for a wedding present. The bride had registered at Kohl’s and I had a copy of her registry. I decided to buy a sheet set. When we got to the linen section, I handed the list to my daughter.

“Just read off the first few letters of the merchandise number,” I told her, “so I can find the right sheets.” I started down the sheet aisle. Behind me my daughter called out in a clear, loud voice, over and over,

Got to love her honesty

This is what my view will be like in Heaven.

 

When my daughter was about two, she went to the freezer and took out the 1/2 gallon container of ice cream and put it on the counter. Too tired to deal with the situation properly, I simply asked, “Would you like a bowl?” She responded,

I wonder that too

Front of a box of Scooby Snacks from Suncoast. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

On the way to the store this afternoon, my son was particularly irritable and whiny. I realized, and exclaimed aloud, that I forgot to give him a snack. My ever-observant and critical four-year-old daughter piped up from the back,

Why can’t I just have a CHICKEN POT PIE?!

Sometimes pregnancy hormones make you feel like you’re insane.  When I was about nine-weeks pregnant, we were on a road trip, and finding something that I thought I could eat was a challenge.  The one thing that actually sounded good was chicken pot pie, so when we saw a Cracker Barrel, I thought I was good to go. 

The truth comes out.

When I took my 11-year-old son with me to a restaurant, it became clear that the woman who walked us to our table was quite taken with him.

“What beautiful red hair!” she told him. His face changed color to match. Then she said, “You really are one handsome young man. Do you know that?”

To this he responded by throwing his arms up in the air and saying,

Ah, nothing like waking up to the fresh smell of… what the?!

My nearly two-year-old daughter climbed into bed with me this morning. So sweet, right? That’s what I thought at first. She had taken her clothes off because she wanted me to change her poopy diaper…which was leaking…and had leaked all over the sheets, and a bit on the comforter, AND on the floor, my oldest pointed out. Not quite my idea of the perfect way to start my day. But the best part came when I was in the bathroom, bottom sheet soaking in one sink, while I scrubbed the top sheet in the other. The culprit started to push the door open when her four-year-old sister, sensing my mood, loudly whispered to her,

Well, he does have a point.

When I was having a stern conversation with my four-year-old son, saying, “God knows what’s in your heart,” the boy replied,

Join us for some adult education… and entertainment!

After church one Sunday, my husband stayed in the chapel to pray, and I went to the hall to listen to an adult education talk with our 18-month-old daughter. I was really enjoying the talk until my daughter got away and ran with her speedy little feet onto the stage in front of everyone.