As heard in a fourth grade classroom

One of my students lent me a book. “I’ll bring it back to you on Monday,” I told her. She replied in a semi-condescending tone, “Ummm, no, Mrs. P., you won’t be able to finish it by then. Not with all YOUR homework!”

Assisting a student with a question on her science test, I read, “Which of the following three things would make a good conductor of electricity?”
“Can you give me a hint?” she asked.
“Sorry, Sweetie, I can’t give any hints. I can only read the question.”
“Well, the only conductors I know of are music conductors and train conductors, so could you maybe just tell me which one it is between the two?”

He should have paid more to get a tv that sat the correct way. (Photo credit: ky_olsen)

While trying to help one of my students with a math problem I said, “If Jim spent $189.90 of his savings on a t.v. and still had $374.98 left in his account, how much did he have altogether before buying the t.v.?”
The student, with a befuddled look on her face, replied, “I don’t know, because Jim shouldn’t be going into the bank to get money without his mom.”

Later conversation with my student:
“You didn’t finish the book I let you borrow, did you?” she asked.
“Actually, I brought it back for you today!” I replied.
“YES! I won the bet! You owe my five pieces of taffy!” she exclaimed.
“Wait a second. What bet? There was no bet, Missy.”
“Oh, yeah,” she shrugged and smiled. “I just really wanted some taffy, though.”

One student said one day, “Mrs. P., I think you’re going to be a really great teacher, when you grow up!”