Tag Archives: kids say the darndest things

Ol’ What’s-His-Name

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Here’s one from my draft slush pile that I just rediscovered and found rather amusing. The timing is off, but hey….

The night before Thanksgiving my sister took her daughter to New York City to watch the balloons being blown up for the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade.  On the way to the city her four-year-old asked, Read the rest of this entry

So close…

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I’m trying my hand at novel writing. My oldest is eager to read my book. I’ve caught her a couple of times trying to read over my shoulder as I type, but I’ve told her she’s too young for it. At dinner she asked, “Can I just read the parts that I’m not too young for?” I said she can read it when it’s published. She’ll probably have children of her own by then, so it should be all good.

Then my seven-year-old said, “Maybe your book will be made into a movie.”

“That would be great!” I said, impressed that she was looking out for the success of her momma.

But then she added, Read the rest of this entry

Misc. funny lines

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Speaking to his toys: “Hi. I’m Daniel. I’m going to keep you safe from Katherine. She is a big giant.” (In case you haven’t guessed it, Katherine is his big sister.) -posted by a friend on Facebook

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Something you never expect to hear from an adorable little blonde girl: “Mom! Come see my poop! It’s enormous!”

Yes, I did go see it. And she was correct. Read the rest of this entry

Must have been an arranged marriage

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My five-year-old daughter and a friend were discussing relationships.  The concept of friendship came up, and she declared, “Mom and Dad aren’t friends!  They’re Read the rest of this entry

Animal Geography

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My three-year-old asked me, “Where do penguins live?”

 

 

 

“In Antarctica,” I told her.

 

 

 

“What about polar bears?”

 

 

 

“Near the North Pole.”

 

 

 

“Giraffes?”

 

 

 

“Africa.”

 

 

 

“Toucans?”

 

 

 

“South America.”

 

 

 

Then, triumphant in her knowledge, she exclaimed,

 

 

 

Read the rest of this entry

Sometimes kids are too smart for their own good.

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mmmm doughnut ...

mmmm doughnut … (Photo credit: bunchofpants) What kind of a photo credit is that?!

 

When her grandparents were visiting, I tried to get my six-year-old to go to the grocery store with them. She wasn’t really interested, so I told her that they were going to buy donuts, which was true. Still not enticed, I suggested that, since the store was new to them, they would need her help finding the donuts.

 

Unswayed, she responded, Read the rest of this entry

More fun than watching paint dry

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My granddaughter stood unmoving for the longest time, staring into a corner.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Watching a Read the rest of this entry

What do kids know anyway?

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When my daughter was about three-years-old, we were playing in her room one morning . I had not even showered, brushed my hair, or anything.  We were sitting on the floor and hugging each other, and she looked up at me and said, Read the rest of this entry

“I have no idea where she learned that word,” the mother says innocently

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At dinner one night, we had potatoes and various vegetables with our meal. Seeing the proximity in color between the potatoes and cauliflower made me remember the time when my husband was heating up some left over mashed potatoes. Much to his chagrin while eating them, he discovered a rogue piece of cauliflower amongst his spuds, masterly disguising itself as a fellow tuber.

When I reminded him of that incident, my eight-year-old daughter said, “And when you found it, did you say, Read the rest of this entry

Children can be so tactful

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When my son was about six years old, he attended a prayer meeting with my mom and me for our American Italian Club.  Everyone had an opportunity to mention their intention, and my son decided he wanted to pray for his grandma, who was there with us. My  mom was smiling with pride until he added, Read the rest of this entry