I recently started taking Chex Mix with me to parties–a sure fire way of being invited back. Since there were a lot of parties for the holidays, I ran out and hit my local store to replenish my supplies. The Chex Mix Guy (CMG) had ordered a box of both Cheddar and Honey Nut for me back in October, housing them in his office, while I slowly chipped away at them.
Crying Chex Mix
Amidst the regular shopping I did first, I glanced down at the Chex Mix shelf and saw, amongst the black and blue of Bold and Boring (aka Traditional) the golden hues of my sacred flavors.
I marched to the customer service desk and asked the lady to call CMG’s office. She got him on the phone and relayed the message: “A customer wants to know if you put out all of her Chex Mix.”
Here I’m grinning stupidly, thinking this must be one of the most bizarre statements this woman has ever made. That, and I’m imagining what CMG’s reaction must be.
Twice actually. A few weeks ago, the 99c sale was on, calling me like a siren song. I hoped I’d see the CM guy so I could continue our funny banter. I was nearly disappointed until I saw him at the last check stand on my way out. (Click here and here for the first two encounters with the Chex Mix guy.)
“Hey, Chex Mix guy.” [I actually used his real name, but you know, privacy and all that.] When he looked up, I said, “Time to restock the Chex Mix again.”
Without missing a beat, he said, “Yeah, I knew it when I saw you come in.” [He probably didn’t see me come in.]
Chex Mix is delish. I especially like the cheddar flavor. And let’s not forget Turtle Chex with its chocolately goodness. So when the CM, as the cool kids call it*, goes on sale, I pounce.
[*No one calls it this. Definitely NOT cool kids anyway.]
The grocery store advertised Chex Mix for $1.99 for the Family Size bags. I was all over that. But the only bags on the shelf were of the smaller size, NOT on sale, for something absurd like $3.99.
However, there was no Family Size to be found. A worker looked everywhere and confirmed this.
I said, “So I’m not crazy.”
He said, “Well, we’ve established that you’re right about the Chex Mix, but that doesn’t prove you aren’t crazy.”
I was rather shocked, first of all by his wit, which made me LOL, and secondly that a comment like that was “allowed.” Doesn’t it fly in the face of “the customer is always right” mentality? I didn’t mind of course, as I love a good laugh.
His solution to my dilemma was to sell me two of the smaller 8 oz. bags at the cost of the as-advertised-but-nowhere-in-sight 15 oz. bags.
My mom nearly forgot my daughter’s birthday. Her card arrived a few days late, but she was prepared with her excuse.
Here’s what came in the envelope:
And so, the enclosed letter from “Harold Postman”:
That’s how you write an excuse with flair.
A blogger who knows who he is, has talked about Dot’s pretzels and how superb they are (probably even erroneously claiming their superiority to my beloved Chex Mix). I didn’t give much thought to Dot’s, as they seemed to be local to his area.
But, lo and behold:
Now, now, folks, let’s not assume Dot’s has superiority based on perceived value due to cost and shelf placement. Yes, Mark, I was tempted, but, no, I didn’t buy your favored over-priced snack of choice.
I will, however, keep an eye on it in case it goes on sale to something reasonable! Then I’ll give it a try. Maybe. Perhaps. Probably.
Anyone eat anything new and interesting lately?
What’s the best excuse you’ve ever given or received?
Is my Mom great, or what? (Yes, Mom, I can see you beaming from here.)
Image 3: Joe: “It’s not a flower. It’s a bomb that explodes people.”
Yep. That’s my son, folks.
I recently visited a larger version of the store where I normally buy Chex Mix. Curious, I wandered into the snack aisle to see what varieties of Chex Mix there might be.
Behold! Varieties I didn’t even know existed!
Did you know Chex Mix made these flavors? Would you try the Buffalo Ranch with “Flavor Blasted Spicy Buffalo Chex Pieces + Ranch Chex Mix” or the “Hot and Spicy” (ya think?) Ghost Pepper with “Danger” and “Scary Hot” written on the packaging?
These two are writing a book together in a google doc. Because they can see what the other is typing, as she’s typing it, when one misspelled a word on her computer, the other corrected it on her own. Then the first wrote in the doc, “Show off,” and they both started laughing.
While they were washing dishes earlier, I heard them discussing what hair color to give a particular character.
Many of you were disheartened by the thought of never again hearing stories of the Chex Mix Guy (CMG). Your comments on that last post were quite entertaining and endearing. For instance:
“I can’t believe this ends the Tale of the CMG! Sequel? prequel??”
“Oh, no! This can’t be the end! It can’t!”
“He’ll miss you. One day he will wake up and wonder ‘What ever happened to Crazy Chex Mix Lady?’”
And of course my favorite: “Who wouldn’t miss CCML??”
Happy Chex Mix
Since I hate to let you down, this happened… (Just remember that I do all of this for you, my dear Blog Buddies.)
Last week I loaded my cart, and, surprised to see CMG slumming it at the check stands with lowly riffraff customers, rather than in his ivory managerial tower, I headed to his lane. It was the express lane. There wasn’t an overtly posted sign about the item limit, though I knew whatever the limit was, I was over it.