Note: the pics have nothing to do with the story (until the end) but add a little levity, I hope. 🙂
The Saturday after Thanksgiving is an excellent time to get a procedure done. I was worried about finding close parking (wish I had a handicap sticker hanger thingy), or any parking, but the lot was all but empty. Score!
When a technician asked what I had done to my foot, I explained it was a martial arts injury. More details appeared to me needed. “Jiu-jitsu,” I replied. More still. “I sort of bent it backwards toward my leg.” And yet more. “It was a double leg takedown.” For the record, this person did not have the air of someone who does or knows much about martial arts.
Later I overheard this conversation being relayed to another technician who laughed at “double leg takedown.”
I had to leave my knee scooter outside the room and was offered assistance to make it to the table. I declined, thinking, “I don’t need assistance!” hopped my way over, momentarily twisted my good ankle, and yelped when my bad foot hit the floor. Pride goeth before the fall and all that.
The technician offered me a blanket (not needed. The temp was great) and tucked a couple under my legs so there wouldn’t be strain on my knees while my feet were propped in little holsters. My lower back could have used a blanket, as there was space between it and the table, thus putting strain on my tailbone, but you can’t win them all.
That tailbone was a helpful distraction since I wasn’t supposed to move my foot at all, and nothing makes your foot want to twitch like not being able to move it at all.
The whole thing took 12 minutes, I was told. It seemed to go by fairly quickly, actually.
Amazingly, I got the results Monday afternoon.
A woman from the doctor’s office said my MRI showed “some bone bruising” on my foot and lower leg. When I asked about the ligament, she merely repeated the aforementioned prognosis. I was offered, and accepted, a referral to an orthopedic specialist. Now I’ll have to wait weeks for that to go through, and who knows how much longer before the actual appointment.
Okay, so “bone bruising”? What the heck is that? Dr. Google says it’s just shy of a fracture (good) and takes 2-4 months to heal. (Crud.)
Seeing as how I’ve just begun Month Three and my foot is still swollen, I’m guessing I’m leaning more toward the 4-month end of that timeline.
I also wouldn’t be surprised if it went longer. Sigh.
In the meantime, Facebook has shown three of my Jiu-Jitsu friends earn their fourth stripes. By the time I return, they, and no doubt others, will have tested on to the next class. Will anyone I know be left? I’ll have to break in a whole new batch of dudes who’ll have to get used to a girl busting up their boys’ club.
As least I can be fairly certain Instructor will have my back. Months ago, in the Before time, I came in a bit late. Instructor greeted me, mid-instruction, by doing the whole gangsta/rapper peace sign double tapped to the chest then extended out toward me thing. I cracked up.
As far as Taekwondo goes, I told Sensei:
“This class was supposed to be a bonding thing for the girls and me to do together. Now it’s them (air circle in their general direction) and it’s me (air circle toward me). It’s no longer us (air circle… you get the idea).”
“That’s what you get for cheating,” he said.
“I didn’t cheat in this class,” I replied indignantly.
“No, you cheated on this class.”
The girls test for their brown belts at the end of next month. I’ll just be watching from the back of the room with my foot propped up on a chair. The irony of my earlier joke about stopping at blue because it’s my favorite color…
But the plant on my desk reminds me not to give up hope.
So there you have it, friends. That’s my “zombie foot” update, as I “affectionately” call my puffy purple appendage. What do you think? And which pic was your fave?