Alive and chippin’

Standard

masksRecent conversation with a friend:

Me: I laugh at all these gaining-weight-due-to-quarantine memes, but then looked down at my stomach and thought, “Oh.”
I wondered where the tummy was coming from as I reached into the cupboard for my nightly potato chips…
Friend: You only live once. πŸ™‚
Me: It will be a shorter life if I die in a pile of potato chip crumbs…. πŸ˜‰
Me: Instead of flowers, people will bring Ruffles and Lays to my grave site.
Me: Ooooohhhh…. Can I just have that now??

Then I got excited thinking she would deliver said choco-dipped chips to my doorstep someday soon, but then realized she was thinking of this more as a DIY project for me. My enthusiasm crumpled like another empty bag of potato chips.
cover2BTW, months ago I received this really nice, succinct comment after mentioning my book, Be a Happier Parent or Laugh Trying in a post:

“Your book is fantastic.”

Day-maker, anyone?

Last week I did a Skype interview where the interviewer tried to read a paragraph from the first page of the introduction. It took her a few tries. At one point she was doubled over laughing. Then she restarted and had to pause yet again as she tried to compose herself. Honestly, I didn’t think it was that funny, but hey, I’m always happy to make people laugh.

Here’s the part she read:

book para

So, folks, if you like me, and if you want more funny stuff to read, perhaps learn something in the process–though not a requirement, (My mom told me a childless friend of hers laughed her way through this book.) please grab a copy to support my potato chip habit. Er, I mean, personal trainer once this quarantine is over! Right now it’s on sale for $2.96 in paperback and $2.83 on kindle! (Don’t know how long that will last.)

Hope everyone is holding up well! Let me know how you’re doing!!

80 responses »

  1. There’s a candy shop in Seaside, Oregon, that sells chocolate-covered Pringles. That combination of salty, sweet, and crunchy is worth the journey. Plus, the Oregon coast ain’t bad to look at, either!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. Too funny! I’ve added a copy of your book to my cart. Strange that Amazon doesn’t consider it essential and warned me that there may be a longer than normal delivery time.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. omg the eating and weight gain thing – is a thing!! I just had my dd saying “mummy baby in belly” and I’m like… nahhhhhhhhhhh! in completely unrelated news, my maternity tights from way back are still really comfy hahaha xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Oh yeah! They sometimes have samples at Costco. It is good stuff. I haven’t fully taken the plunge into buying one of those giant bags (b/c, with Costco, everything is giant), but that would certainly be a healthier alternative.

      Like

  4. I can vouch for the interviewer–the whole book (pretty much) is guaranteed to garner strange looks from family members due to sudden outbursts of laughter or the attempt to suppress said laughter. Seriously. πŸ˜€

    And CM instead of potato chips. I wonder what chocolate-covered CM would taste like. As good as Turtle CM? Hey, new project for your girls!

    Hope you are all doing well! The neighbor cats still visit, right? πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

    Liked by 4 people

    • You’re so great, Julie. Thank you for that! (For being great, and for what you wrote.) Did I mention to you that the CMG put in for a promotion and a transfer? Seriously… what will I do? Well, for one, be sure he orders me another box before he leaves.

      One of the neighbor cats basically lives here now. Not inside, but I’ve found her sleeping in our garage, she hangs out in our yard, meows at our door, comes around to the other door and scratches. She even tried to buy us with a dead gopher–believe me, that almost did it for Paul. So, she’s basically ours. I just have to shoo her out of the garage at night before I close it. She’s great though!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I always enjoy your sense of humor. I cannot imagine how anyone is going to survive these times if they can’t laugh at themselves. I also wonder how anyone will survive these times and not gain weight. Just saying…

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Hi Betsy, This is a huge compliment when the interviewer needs to compose herself because she is β€œdoubled over laughing.” Yes, the joys of Motherhood and all of the conflicting, well-meaning advice. My daughters are isolated with their little ones. One of them has 2 boys, 6 weeks old and under 2 year old. She looks happy during Zooming chaos, or is it just a wild, scary smile. Now I am craving chips and I don’t even eat chips. Thank you for my smile. Take care.

    Liked by 3 people

    • At least your dear, sweet daughter isn’t bored during isolation! When my third was born, my oldest was four. I definitely had the wild, scary smile for quite a while. πŸ™‚ I didn’t eat chips, either, but somehow they became a staple in recent history. Must’ve been a good sale at the store. πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Why is it the munchies for junk food always happen right before bedtime????? I wonder if I had my junk food earlier in the day whether I would still hanker after it at 11pm?

    Congratulations on cracking your interviewer up! You do have a gift of seeing the humour in the everyday, and delivering it in such a no-nonsense voice – which makes it even funnier …. so I can well understand the hysterics the interviewer found herself!

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Haha! This is so funny, Betsy! πŸ˜‚ Chocolate covered chips sound quite tempting. πŸ˜‰ And wearing masks in the house could be a sensible precaution for not gaining weight. πŸ˜‚

    Liked by 3 people

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