When looking for a story to post this week, I checked my plethora of drafts where I’ve housed snippets of funny things to save for later.
It’s later.
So prepare yourself for a series disjointed stories while I clean up my draft folder. For instance:
1. My daughter’s knee collided with my son’s nose earlier today. His nose bled a little, though it stayed internal. He adamantly refused to let me clean it. Just now he sneezed and a bloody, snotty blob landed on me. I’m choosing to take the win and be glad his nostril is now clear.
2. Husband: I like you.
Me: Ditto, kiddo.
Him: Ditto, kiddo?
Me, shrugging: It rhymed.
Him: Can I take it back?
3. Church homily: “Ask Jesus to change your mind and change your heart.”
My two-year-old: “And change your diaper.”
4. My friend’s son went to the tux rental store for his prom suit and asked for a tux with a concubine. (He meant cummerbund.)
Which story was your favorite?
When searching for a tux photo, I found several pics of black and white cats too (and penguins. Of course, the penguins). But since there are so many cat lovers among you, here was my favorite offering. I’ll name him Cummerbund.
I like the third one best. “And your diaper.” Classic!
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Yep, that was a good one. He’s almost as funny as his dad. (I’d forgotten these stories!)
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Oh what fun being a mom! The snot one–not so much. I think ‘cummerbun’ wins!
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The snot one was a time when it was not so much fun being a mom, but it’s all a part of the gig!
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LOL! Number four is my favorite! 🙂
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Yep, best for last, Jill. I wonder how the tux shop employee responded to that. 🙂
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Haha – the tux story is my favorite!
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Right? How did the tux shop employee respond, I wonder? 🙂 Thanks for reading, Book Club Mom!
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Yup, third one. And I bet you spent more time looking for young men in a tux than you did for cat pictures … just say’n …
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I thought you knew me better, Andrew. Cats over kids, always. (Unless we’re talking baby goats, maybe.)
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I can’t decide between Jesus changing diapers and tuxes coming with concubines. Lol.
Thanks for the laughs. 🙂
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My pleasure, Diana. Thanks for reading! 🙂
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Your son is a budding comedian, you know 😀 And I can just imagine the look on the tux salesperson’s face 😀 So, weighing the amount of time you spent looking for men in tuxes versus black and white cats…. I’d say it’s a draw 😉 Okay, cats win by a whisker 😀
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I definitely enjoyed the cat pictures more. I’m not a cougar!
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1. Oh gross.
2. Sounded more like a dad joke than a mom witty.
3. Poor Jesus, I think he did enough for us.
4. 😂FAVORITE!
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Thanks for the full break down! My husband is a funny funny man. I do like him. 🙂
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THat works out in favor of the marriage 🙂
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Indeed. I got a good one. 🙂
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What a blessing.
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A good sense of humor was a requirement. That and math skills, which I lack. Someone needs to pick up my slack. 😉
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It’s all about that balance 🙂
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Knowledge balance is helpful when you’re on the same team for Trivial Pursuit too. 😉
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Good point PIF. You should write a book about marriage 🙂
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Funny thing is, not only did I write a book about marriage, I even mentioned the Trivial Pursuit thing in it!
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😉 (I like giving you a little plug) 🙂
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🙂
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The tux story! I would love to have seen the clerk’s face when given that request!
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Haha! I know, right?!
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I love the 3rd on because it really shows how much that two year old was paying attention in church 🙏 you don’t see that too much plus it’s funny 👊😂 thanks for the laughs 😊
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Glad you enjoyed, Tyler. I, too, was surprised he was paying attention!
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Loved them all. In the second one, I was waiting for your rhyming rejoinder to his ‘Can I take it back?’ Now we know where the kids get their funny bones from!. Hope you have more funny anecdotes in your drafts folder!
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I hope I have more good stuff in the drafts folder too. It’s a bit of an abyss in there. Now I’m disappointed I didn’t have a witty comeback to my husband, but I suppose I’m happy to let him have that one. 😉 Thanks, Zephyr!
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#3 will be my laugh for the day. Such a practical little twerp you’ve got there.
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“Practical little twerp”–and that’s MY laugh for the day! Thanks, Ally Bean. 🙂
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Concubine for the win!
I have some interesting half-finished drafts that have never made their way onto my blog, too. I wonder if I should borrow a page from you and do a similar post?
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Why not? It’s a great way to clean stuff up–and provide content. 🙂
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unpopular opinion – i like the first one!
I can imagine this super determined little dude with blood everywhere just being all like “yeah, i’m fine.nothing to see here” hahahaha
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Wow, thanks. I’m happy to finally get a vote for the first one. It was just a typical moment in the life of a mom! 🙂 Thanks for voting, GG!
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Betsy, all great ones and reckon you have a lot of laughs in your family! It was nearly a tie between 3 and 4 but the latter wins it! Did you son realise what he’d said at the time or did someone have to explain it to him later? Cringe!! 😀
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Number 4 has definitely been the winner. I’m glad I ended on that one. I think my son did know what he said. We laughed–as quietly as possible–and then dropped the matter. 🙂 Thanks for reading, Annika!
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Oh my! I am in stitches!
My favourite has to be the Diaper Quip – your little boy is hysterical!
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Thanks! 😛
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How to choose between snotty blobs, Jesus changing diapers & tuxedo concubines?😂😂😂
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Right? I wonder what other randomness I have hiding in my draft folder. I had completely forgotten these stories. So glad I jotted them down somewhere! Thanks for reading, IM! 🙂
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Haha these all are funny. I love your exchange with your husband but then again I am a sucker for “aw!” Moments lol!
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Thanks, Pallavi. I enjoyed that particular exchange too. He’s so funny. 🙂
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These are great! Glad I’m not the only one that keeps an idea lost!
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Totally. Gotta write this stuff down somewhere or it’s lost forever. Already, looking back, I realized I’d already forgotten these stories.
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It’s a tie for me between the tux and your son!
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Those two were the best. 🙂
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They’re all funny, but I like the tux story best. Cheers!
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That one is the clear winner. Thanks, ckh!
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The tux one made me laugh in particular
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Yep. That was a good one. Thanks, Allie P!
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