Totally cheating here

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by doing a throw-back Thursday post. Though, in truth, many, most, maybe even all, of you weren’t around this long ago, so it may be new to you. This is from four years ago.

I only wish these stories weren’t true

While at work on his birthday, a coworker asked my husband how old he was.

“Forty-seven,” my husband said glibly, choosing an age far enough from the truth so as to be an obvious lie.

“Wow, you look good for your age,” the coworker replied. “You don’t look a day over 40!”

“I was joking,” responded my husband drily. “I’m only 37.”

“Oh,” said the man. Then he quickly excused himself to the bathroom.

Even though that happened nearly a year ago, that story still cracks me up. As does this one:

My darling, beautiful, bright blue-eyed five-year-old daughter in her purple floral dress and blonde pigtails was playing with her stuffed animals: a small tiger named “El Tigre” in one hand, and a smaller bunny rabbit [name unknown] in the other. One was hopping at top speed while the other ran along behind.

“He’s chasing the bunny,” my daughter sweetly informed me. Then her hands got closer and closer together as the tiger gained on the bunny. Suddenly, to my horror and surprise, the tiger pounced on the bunny. “Got it!” she exclaimed. The poor defenseless rabbit lay sprawled on its stomach, arms and legs askew as my daughter dipped the tiger’s face up and down on the rabbit while making noises like, “Nom nom nom.”

Then she looked up and beamed at me, “He’s eating it!”

Warning: Image may be disturbing to small children, but apparently not mine.

Warning: Image may be disturbing to small children, but apparently not mine.

What the…? No more Animal Planet for her, that is, if she watched Animal Planet in the first place. Where did she learn this? I wouldn’t be surprised to find this as innate behavior in a boy, but my sweet little girl? I was a little shocked by it all but also greatly amused. I couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the scene. Carnage and cuteness don’t normally mix.

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32 responses »

  1. Well…….poor husband….but that’s what he gets for being dishonest…..I think.

    Tiger eating rabbit? I don’t like the image of it but I suppose it’s that circle of life thing. Even with stuffed animals….

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    • He was going for humor. It back-fired in one sense, but made for even more humor in another. It cracked him up, so it’s all good.

      I guess I should be glad my kids are okay with the way nature works. They know what we’re eating when we have meat for dinner, and it doesn’t bother them that that’s the way it is. I should be grateful.

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  2. I am one of those with a baby face and look about 10 years younger than I am, so I generally get a much different reaction when asked how old I am. Normally I reply by asking them how old they think I am and when they say 45 I generally reply with, “Oh, how sweet, will you marry me?” Very effective in getting men to stop asking me that question …

    as for the tiger, well, you might need to buy a few more rabbits to keep it feed.

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    • Ha! On both counts. When I told someone recently this was my fourth child, she said, “You must’ve started when you were 12!” I said, “No 25, but thank you.” She said I must be Irish. Guilty. I guess the fair skin comes in handy sometimes. She thought I was in my early 20s, not pushing 40. She may also have been partially blind.

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      • “You must be Irish”… I doubt that refers to your complexion. πŸ™‚ Probably more to the stereotype invoked by the phrase “Irish twns” (i.e. babies born less than a year apart). Because, you know–the Irish are Catholic, and Catholics breed like rabbits, because the Pope tells them too… Sigh.

        You DO have a fair, pretty complexion–I’m jealous. πŸ™‚

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  3. When my teenage daughter and I played sport together people would ask if we were sisters – wow, that really made me feel good!! And recently when my daughter was married a magazine picked up the story and placed a picture of my daughter and my mother-in-law in their magazine as an example of “mother of the bride” photos (even though I had been standing beside her in the previous photo). Both my mother-in-law and I thought that was an awesome testament to us not really looking our ages!
    The tiger/bunny story is great – your daughter certainly knows the places of creatures in the animal kingdom! Clever little girl πŸ™‚

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    • That is great! Yeah, I can’t say I mind when people are surprised to learn my age. Also, someone asked how old the baby was, and when I said 3.5 weeks, she looked me up and down then said, “Wow.” I didn’t mind that, either. πŸ˜‰

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  4. I cracked up reading this. I can totally see my son doing the same thing. Then again he does have a picture hanging on his wall which he drew featuring dinosaurs being plummeted by bits of asteroid while fire rained down on helpless others, so it would be par for the course.

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  5. Funny about your husband’s experience. I trust he’s taken it all in stride. Interesting about your daughter’s desire to hunt down the rabbit. Seems like she might be aware of the pecking order of relationships. Smart girl.

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  6. Great stories, B! I usually get the “look” when people find out how old I am (for the record, I look much younger–and I know, I could just be saying that, but I was close to thirty the last time I was carded, so πŸ˜› ) Love the story of the hunting tiger and unfortunate bunny! I inadvertently taught my nephew some of the laws of the wild when I stayed with my sister to help with her new baby (i.e., keep her son occupied for a while πŸ™‚ ) She mentioned her son talking about what animal eats what (lion vs antelope, I think) and was surprised I’d gone there with him (he was about 3 at the time). Hey, it’s the circle of life, right? πŸ˜€

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  7. I have missed on that age question so many times.. I try to avoid it…or try to also do it incredibly younger than what I think in order to coax a grin.. I hope everyone is doing well Betsy!

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