Where to begin?
It’s embarrassing to admit that I thought of you all many times on this trip, sometimes even by name. I do have friends in real life too, honest! But I was frequently thinking of how I would write up certain things for this blog and you, my beloved blog buddies.
After I got through the security check in San Diego, I sat down and typed this:
The first pat down was painless. They not only had the footprint floor mat facing away from the maddening crowd of the security line, they took me a little ways off to the side. There was an onlooker this time (like in D.C.) but only because my “patter” was a trainee. She was gentle (unlike in D.C.). The only hitch was I needed to hold my pants up while she frisked my legs. “This is embarrassing enough without my pants falling down,” I said. She was kind enough to let me break protocol and put my arms down for that part of the procedure.
When she checked my belly, I said, “Yes, it’s real.” Both women laughed and gushed over how cute and petite it was. I managed to survive that part. 😉
They wished me a Happy Mother’s Day, and I was on my way.
Even though it was a little sad to be traveling on Mother’s Day, since I’m obviously a mother, thanks to this beer gut, I got a hearty Happy M. D. from the kind lady I bought my lunch from, as well as one of the flight attendants, who gushed over my belly, asked me several questions, told me a little about her son, and then finally continued beverage service. When she finished she came back, leaned her arm against the overhead bin above me, and we chatted me some more.
The woman who did my pat down in the Birmingham airport on the way home asked me similar questions in the same exact tone as she gave the run-down of the procedure. Matter-of-factly she said, as her hands did their business:
“When are you due?”
“Congratulations. Boy or girl?”
“Congratulations. Is this your first?”
“Congratulations. Wait a minute while I scan my glove…”
It was entertaining and endearing at the same time. Also, I realized something important: Pat downs are not a big deal. I should stop whining about them. Sure, I had an aggressive woman in D.C., but I should be grateful she takes her job seriously. It’s a sign that she enjoys it. Someone who did a cursory, bored inspection probably dislikes her job, and I’d feel sad for her. At least the she-man felt her contribution to our nation’s safety was worthwhile and important. I ought not to have complained.And because you may be wondering, my lower back pain was all but gone by Sunday morning. As I was walking through the airport, I noticed I wasn’t waddling but wondered if it was because pulling my suitcase was balancing me out. When I was suitcase-free in Birmingham, I realized the pain and the wobble were at 2% or less. It felt semi-miraculous. Truly. The only times I felt a flair up where when I needed to carry my suitcase up and down a short flight of stairs in the guest house, but once I set it down, I was fine.
It was amazing. As much as I realize in hindsight that I shouldn’t have complained about it, I also can’t help but think it worked in my favor due to the prayers and/or well-wishes from you that seemed to have made a tangible difference. Honestly, I have no other explanation. I’m almost tearing up over here. Thank you SO much. The trip, in regards to the back and the pat-downs, couldn’t have gone better. I can’t thank you enough!
I know you want to hear more about the show, the filming, pictures, everything–the exciting stuff, but I’ll have to save it for the next post. I will say, however, that it was terrific. I had a blast and absolutely loved it.
More to come!!