I should at least teach her how to apply it properly


I lay down for ten minutes. That was my first mistake.

The Joker

When I hauled myself out of bed, not nearly refreshed, I was soon greeted by a very red face. No, it wasn’t that my two-year-old daughter was embarrassed, though she should have been. It wasn’t that she’d been hitting the wine bottle, not that I would have preferred that. It was that my five-year-old had gotten her hands on my expensive lipstick, the kind that, once you apply it, you better hope you did a good job because it’s not going to budge for hours.

Well, my daughter did not do a good job “making [her] little sister beautiful,” as she put it. It was hideous, like The Joker had applied his make-up on a roller coaster. The red lines stretched from ear to ear, forehead to chin, leaving little space in between. I was horror-stricken.

I tried washing it off, but it was fruitless. I wasn’t sure if my daughter’s face was red from the lipstick still, or from my constant rubbing. I had to finally leave it alone. I wasn’t able to get it all off until the next morning.

From now on, I’m just going to buy the cheap stuff.

-Becky, mother of 4

19 responses »

  1. Just when you thought you could hide something from the kids…keep it high enough…or “lock” it away….kids seem to always find a way to get at what they want. Tenacious tikes!


      • Actually, it was the puppy who was on my mind as I checked — we have a half-Saint Bernard puppy, and I was imagining the mayhem that my daughters’ decision to “make him pretty” with just tempera paint caused. The thought of lipstick on a hundred pounds of wriggling, bounding, furry enthusiasm had be just about howling with laughter!


      • How funny then that I happened to say, “puppies” secure! Now if the situation you describe were to happen, it would certainly make for a great story–and photos!


  2. Pingback: Ruth Institute Blog » I should at least teach her how to apply it properly

  3. This post made me smile, once my youngest decided to paint her face with marker, yes marker. Thankfully I only keep washable markers in the house for just this possibility! Have photos too, I’m sure she’ll love them when we share them later in life.
    Thank you for visiting my site caramelizelife.com now I know about yours ;0)



    • Once my middle child (seeking attention, perhaps?) while sitting on her potty chair, colored her body–all but face!–with a brown marker: legs, arms, stomach, sides. I took a picture of it too. She’s holding up her shirt proudly to show off her work. I’d post the picture, but as she’s on her potty, it wouldn’t be PG. But that was certainly a moment where a sense of humor came in handy!

      Just visited your blog again. The picture of the carrots “hugging” was very cool. My seven-year-old is particularly fond of our veggie garden. She planted beans, which are doing well, but did not name them Beanie! ๐Ÿ™‚


      • I love it!
        My oldest daughter is doing a school project -a biography so we are going through all the photos and I realized my youngest was not the ONLY one to use markers all over her face… I guess Mom’s just block out the older details!


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