All in a day’s work

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Česky: Toaletní papír English: Toilet paper Es...

In the morning I discovered my 22-month-old had unrolled all the toilet paper into the toilet, thus forcing me to reach in and pull the bulk of it out by hand so as not to clog the drain when flushed.

At nap time, I heard her calling from her room. She had stripped down to the skin. Poop was on her sheets, body, crib, blankets, and wall. All she had to say for herself was, “Ew.”

You think, kid?!

Having cleaned all that up, I put her back down for a nap, only to hear her calling again several minutes later. Once more, she was completely naked, this time wiping herself dry with her blanket after having peed in the crib. I gave up on the nap.

To end the day, I found her in the bathroom, naked. All the t.p. was unrolled into the toilet, and she had pooped on the floor: The Toddler Trifecta.

I’m calling in sick tomorrow.

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4 responses »

  1. Trish wrote: “You know you’re a mom when your dream vacation is this: to have the house entirely to yourself…to eat a hot meal uninterrupted, to sleep undisturbed, and to pee in privacy! Aaaahhhh, now that’s something Travelocity doesn’t offer!”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. From Anne: Also, you can tell you are a mom if you have four separate wardrobes: maternity, in-between, normal, and “I wore this while we were dating, and I will fit into it again!”

    Like

  3. Also from Anne: You also know you’re a mom if you have ever done laundry in the middle of the night, LOL. (That’s the first time I knew I felt like a Mom – when I was washing vomit soaked sheets at 2AM.)

    Liked by 1 person

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