Tag Archives: funny things kids say

Kids say the funniest things

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My four-year-old daughter was so excited that I put bubbles in the bathtub she said, “I’m so happy I could just scream like a little girl!” Thank you for saying so rather than doing so.

Another time she asked my husband, “Dad, did Jesus make your hair very small?” She’d never seen him getting a hair cut, nor seemed to notice every time it was shorter, so it seemed a valid question.

My seven-year-old daughter was making mistakes with her math worksheet. She wasn’t paying attention to whether or not it was an addition or subtraction problem, as it kept changing on her. I said, “Pay attention to the symbol. The symbol is key.”

She responded in a flowy voice: Read the rest of this entry

So close…

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I’m trying my hand at novel writing. My oldest is eager to read my book. I’ve caught her a couple of times trying to read over my shoulder as I type, but I’ve told her she’s too young for it. At dinner she asked, “Can I just read the parts that I’m not too young for?” I said she can read it when it’s published. She’ll probably have children of her own by then, so it should be all good.

Then my seven-year-old said, “Maybe your book will be made into a movie.”

“That would be great!” I said, impressed that she was looking out for the success of her momma.

But then she added, Read the rest of this entry

I could teach those ancients a thing or two

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My seven-year-old was learning how the Romans borrowed the concept of the gods from the Greeks, but had changed the gods’ names. She noticed that many of them shared their names with planets.

My nine-year-old then ticked off the planet gods in order from the sun and even stated their Greek counterparts (because she’s a total nerd). Then she made an observation. Read the rest of this entry

We don’t talk to friends in this house

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Seeing that a friend had a “No Soliciting” sign on her door, I decided to get one of my own, as I get knocks far too frequently for my liking. I am almost never presentable, (See “Mommy goes out on the town, before and after“) which makes these regrettable encounters all the worse, for the other person.

So even though I had the sign, it wasn’t yet up in the window of the door when some gentleman, probably from a solar panel company who was “doing work on others houses in my neighborhood,” as they always somehow seem to be, showed up.

Before I even let him speak I said, Read the rest of this entry

Misc. funny lines

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Speaking to his toys: “Hi. I’m Daniel. I’m going to keep you safe from Katherine. She is a big giant.” (In case you haven’t guessed it, Katherine is his big sister.) -posted by a friend on Facebook

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Something you never expect to hear from an adorable little blonde girl: “Mom! Come see my poop! It’s enormous!”

Yes, I did go see it. And she was correct. Read the rest of this entry

That MUST be it!

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My four-year-old saw a bird through the window screen. Somehow this elicited from her a very loud, very off-key rendition of the chorus from Frozen’s “Let it go.”

“The bird is not flying away,” she pauses to tell me.

“Maybe it likes your singing,” I suggest.

“Maybe it likes ‘Let it go,’” she tells me.

“That could be,” I say, and she keeps singing for all she’s worth. Finally, having heard enough, the bird did indeed go.

“It flew away,” my daughter tells me sadly.

“I’m sorry,” I say with a frown.

Then, looking at me, her face brightens. “Maybe it Read the rest of this entry

A funny thing happened on our way to Buffalo

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A few weeks ago we were visiting friends at their home near Buffalo, NY. There were some good lines worth sharing during those two days.

For instance, Jay, father of 5, asked  his daughter, “Are you ready for dessert?” She responded by patting her lower stomach and saying, “I have room in my basement.”

I’ve gotta remember that line.

My nine-year-old daughter was helping Jay cook scrambled eggs one morning. “Do you like cooking?” he asked her. “Yes. I have to learn how so I can move out of the house.” Suddenly startled by her own words, she added, Read the rest of this entry