Tag Archives: funny things kids say

The bird flies at midnight

Standard
Post Honey Bunches of Oats with Pecan Bunches

Post Honey Bunches of Oats with Pecan Bunches (Photo credit: theimpulsivebuy)

We have cold cereal for breakfast almost every morning. The names of the different brands of cereal have gotten lost in toddler translation. One of our three-year-old’s favorites is “Honey Bunches of Oats”, but when we ask her what she’d like to eat she says: Read the rest of this entry

You just keep thinking that, kiddo

Standard

Princess bed

Princess bed (Photo credit: esc.ape(d))

 

“Mom, kids run faster than grown ups,” my five-year-old daughter announced to me.

 

“I don’t think that’s true,” I replied.

 

“It is true because at bed time, I tell Daddy, ‘Whoever gets to my room first gets to get in my bed,’ and Read the rest of this entry

Where do they come up with this stuff?

Standard

I told my oldest to get off the card table for fear she would bend it “out of shape.” Then the five-year-old looked at me quizzically and asked, “You mean, like a circle?”

In the bathtub tonight this same daughter was playing with a toy horse and had this to say about it: “This horse’s name is Rainbow. People don’t ride it, though, because it leaves a Read the rest of this entry

You Know You’ve Overstayed Your Welcome When…

Standard
Royal wave

Royal wave

I recently visited my daughter and four grandchildren, aged two to eight. When I left I went to each grandchild for a hug and kiss. When I got to the two-year-old I knelt down and hugged and kissed her. I rocked back on my heels as she gave me the royal wave of good-bye. How cute, I thought. Then she extended her little arm, Read the rest of this entry

Something fishy is going on here

Standard
Fish for sale at the Albertcoup Market, Amsterdam

“I’m not dead yet!” (A little Monty Python reference for you.)

I was in the supermarket doing some food shopping. I turned my back for a second while I picked up a cooked chicken. When I turned around my four-year-old was stroking a fresh fish on the counter.

“Why were you stroking the fish?” I asked her.

She replied, “I wanted to see if it was real.”

“Was it real?” I asked.

“No,” she answered.

“I think it was,” I said.

“No, it wasn’t because I Read the rest of this entry

Funny stuff kids say

Standard

English: Santa Claus with a little girl Espera...

My mom sent these to me in an email. This isn’t my normal fair for this blog, especially because we have no way of knowing if these stories are true (they probably aren’t), but, I have to admit, they are funny. I hope you think so, too.

Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a lecture on the devil. One said to the other, ‘What do you think about all this Satan stuff?’

The other boy replied, ‘Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It’s probably just your Dad.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, ‘Why is the bride dressed in white?’

The mother replied, ‘Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.’

The child thought about this for a moment then said, ‘So why is Read the rest of this entry

There are lessons for that? I want some!

Standard
English: Tree climbing in the New Forest

This person definitely took lessons.

 

The five-year-old I nanny was bragging about his tree climbing skills to a friend of mine. He said, “Yeah, I took tree climbing Read the rest of this entry

She must have boys

Standard
The Kid's Table

The Kid’s Table (Photo credit: Michael Bentley)

The conversation at the lunch table today:
“T is for toot.”
“F is for fart.”
“P is for poop.” Read the rest of this entry

It’s what’s for dinner

Standard
Cow Arzúa, Galicia)

“Just back off, buddy. Eat your spaghetti plain!”

Tonight we had spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. At one point our seven-year-old asked what animal the meat was from. I told her cow. Then she said, “We’re eating Read the rest of this entry

I get that a lot

Standard
An Anglican priest vested as a deacon with an ...

A deacon, though not quite as intimidating. (Wikipedia)

A four-year-old skipped into the vestibule ahead of her mother and skidded to a stop at the Deacon’s feet. Dressed in white, six feet tall and broad-shouldered, he was an intimidating sight. She stared up at him, open-mouthed. After a moment of silence, she asked in awe: Read the rest of this entry