If you are still reading, then you can’t say I didn’t warn you. (Forgive me that there will be no pictures to illustrate this post.)
Ever since our youngest started using the potty many moons ago, her bowels have become a family affair. The older sisters love to see her creations, often assigning a shape and/or name. “Look, it’s an ‘L’!” Or “a snake!” Or “a G!” Once it was even called the great euphemism of “moonlight.” Your guess is as good as mine on that one.
But this one really took the … Well, you’ll see. Read the rest of this entry
My daughters are into this vast series of fairy books where the bad guy is Jack Frost. My six-year-old drew me a picture of a few fairies (sounds girly enough, right?) and of Jack Frost. As she’s explaining the picture to me she said, “This fairy is holding a pile of Read the rest of this entry
For one thing, our six-year-old takes pouting to a whole new extreme. When we were all out and about and desperately hungry, we hit a drive thru. Evidently, it was not at our daughter’s restaurant of choice. She sat in her seat, silent, but wearing the puffiest lower lip imaginable. Then I actually saw her reach up and feel her lips to be sure they were in a downward position, lest she make some mistake in conveying her feelings on the matter!
But what’s even better was the night my husband tucked her in Read the rest of this entry
they’re willing to send me stories like this!
I was in the bathroom taking care of business while my two children milled around on the floor of the bathroom and my bedroom. Upon finishing, I came to the awful realization that not only was I left with an empty roll of TP, but there were no extra rolls in the bathroom either!
The only help I had were a nearly three-year-old and a 10-month-old. Read the rest of this entry
While at work on his birthday, a coworker asked my husband how old he was.
“Forty-seven,” my husband said glibly, choosing an age far enough from the truth so as to be an obvious lie.
“Wow, you look good for your age,” the coworker replied. “You don’t look a day over 40!”
“I was joking,” responded my husband drily. “I’m only Read the rest of this entry
“That shirt is too small for you now. Put it in your little sister’s drawer,” I told my oldest daughter. A few hours later, younger sister discovered the “new” shirt and came into the kitchen, literally strutting, hips gliding side to side, and one hand poised delicately on her hip, much to the amusement of her parents. (Where does she learn these things?) Clearly, she was proud to own the shirt, and I am thankful that my children have yet to hear the fallacy that there is something wrong or abhorrent with hand-me-downs.
In other news, I said something yesterday about one of the girls hording something–toy princesses most likely. Ever interested in expanding her vocabulary, today my eldest complained that the youngest was Read the rest of this entry
I was in the supermarket doing some food shopping. I turned my back for a second while I picked up a cooked chicken. When I turned around my four-year-old was stroking a fresh fish on the counter.
“Why were you stroking the fish?” I asked her.
She replied, “I wanted to see if it was real.”
“Was it real?” I asked.
“No,” she answered.
“I think it was,” I said.
“No, it wasn’t because I Read the rest of this entry
It’s kind of a shame that our seven-year-old can read so well. When I’m at the computer reading some sordid article or having a private conversation through I.M. on gmail, I have to be sure she isn’t anywhere in eyeshot if I don’t want the inquisitive little bugger to read something inappropriate, scary, or just none of her beeswax.
I never thought I’d have to be concerned about her reading junk mail. When my husband came home and plunked the mail on the counter, G. meandered over and soon started crying. More specifically, she was weeping. She wasn’t sobbing and shaking uncontrollably, she just couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down her face. Why? Because: Read the rest of this entry
I was babysitting five little kids. Their mom came home and we were talking for a bit. She then went to get her purse and couldn’t find it. As she was going down the hall to her bedroom, I heard her yell. Seems she looked in the bathroom door on her way by and there Read the rest of this entry