Tag Archives: funny parenting stories

So close…

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I’m trying my hand at novel writing. My oldest is eager to read my book. I’ve caught her a couple of times trying to read over my shoulder as I type, but I’ve told her she’s too young for it. At dinner she asked, “Can I just read the parts that I’m not too young for?” I said she can read it when it’s published. She’ll probably have children of her own by then, so it should be all good.

Then my seven-year-old said, “Maybe your book will be made into a movie.”

“That would be great!” I said, impressed that she was looking out for the success of her momma.

But then she added, Read the rest of this entry

Alas, poor butterfly. I knew him well.

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It was my fault, really. I spotted the butterfly just standing there on our back patio. I called the girls over to see it. They came on tiptoes. Then they sat in awe and spoke in hushed tones, not wishing to disturb it or scare it away.

Attempts to get them to eat breakfast were thwarted by the mystique of the orange, black, and white. Soon sketch pads came out and whole pages were being devoted to the majesty of the monarch.

Suddenly the silence was broken as one girl called out to me a curt but anguished, “Mom!” I rushed to the scene, sensing the distress in her voice. Read the rest of this entry

Two signs of needing a change

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Sign number 1–Change needed: sheets

English: flat sheets Deutsch: Bettlaken

English: flat sheets Deutsch: Bettlaken. You just learned a little German there. You’re welcome! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I changed the sheets on our bed. Admittedly, these probably don’t get changed as often as they should. The proof? When my daughter walked into the room, saw the folded sheets ready to put on the bare bed and asked, Read the rest of this entry

The homeschooling gods are smiling upon me

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There are four weeks left of school. With another week of phonics looming, I grabbed the pile of my daughter’s first grade sight words.

Here is the pile: On the left is what we’ve done so far. On the right is what we have left to do.

z 006

As I picked up the smaller stack to look for next week’s words, these were the three words on top of the pile: Read the rest of this entry

I’d be wary of this one

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A friend of mine posted this on facebook:

Can a two-year-old have aspirations to be a medieval executioner? She has a pair of toy pliers and is attempting to remove my toes while insisting that “it no hurt.”

Medieval torture rack

“You be fine, Mommy. It no hurt.” Medieval torture rack (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

[Several minutes later…]

Now she is approaching with a Read the rest of this entry

You lost me at “Goodnight”

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My 18-month-old daughter kept pointing to the full moon in the book Goodnight Moon and then at the crescent-shaped one on the wall that the cow was jumping over. My husband decided to supply her with, “Well, Sweetheart, sometimes the moon is full when the earth is not blocking it from the sun, and the crescent shape comes from when…[yada yada yada…]” When he finished he said, “Do you understand?”

She nodded her head diligently.

Then I said, “Daddy, Read the rest of this entry

Speaking of that MBA child…

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When negotiations don’t work, there’s always this method…

It was time for me to start making dinner. My six-year-old asked what we were having. I told her sausage, potatoes, and corn or carrots. I even let her VOTE on corn or carrots. (She chose corn. Typical.) But then she decided she wasn’t a big fan of sausage and potatoes and asked if there were any other options. I did sort of feel like making tuna casserole since I had plenty of time for cooking, unlike some nights where sausage is the easy last-minute prep meal. So, I told her tuna was an option.

First she said, “Ohh, I don’t like that.”

I reminded her that she and her sisters always eat it up when I make it. Suddenly her eyes brightened as if remembering, so she wrapped her arms around my waist, squeezed me in a big hug, looked up at me with her beautiful green eyes, and said quietly but intensely, Read the rest of this entry