Tag Archives: funny kid stories

Kids say the funniest things

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My four-year-old daughter was so excited that I put bubbles in the bathtub she said, “I’m so happy I could just scream like a little girl!” Thank you for saying so rather than doing so.

Another time she asked my husband, “Dad, did Jesus make your hair very small?” She’d never seen him getting a hair cut, nor seemed to notice every time it was shorter, so it seemed a valid question.

My seven-year-old daughter was making mistakes with her math worksheet. She wasn’t paying attention to whether or not it was an addition or subtraction problem, as it kept changing on her. I said, “Pay attention to the symbol. The symbol is key.”

She responded in a flowy voice: Read the rest of this entry

This is how we solve problems in our household

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Observe:

“MOMMY! Paul won’t give me the big sticker!”

“Well, John, why don’t you suggest a solution? Maybe find out why he’s saving the big sticker, or maybe see if there’s another sticker he *would* give you, or maybe trade two of your little stickers for his big sticker. Could you try to work something out?”

“Ok…I will…
…PAUL!!! MOMMY SAYS YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME THE BIG STICKER!”

-from one of my favorite FB friends (Names have been changed.)

That MUST be it!

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My four-year-old saw a bird through the window screen. Somehow this elicited from her a very loud, very off-key rendition of the chorus from Frozen’s “Let it go.”

“The bird is not flying away,” she pauses to tell me.

“Maybe it likes your singing,” I suggest.

“Maybe it likes ‘Let it go,'” she tells me.

“That could be,” I say, and she keeps singing for all she’s worth. Finally, having heard enough, the bird did indeed go.

“It flew away,” my daughter tells me sadly.

“I’m sorry,” I say with a frown.

Then, looking at me, her face brightens. “Maybe it Read the rest of this entry

The budding fashionista

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My children were watching a cartoon movie. It was one that they’d seen before. As such, I was rather confused when my four-year-old daughter quickly covered her eyes during one part. Usually once they’ve seen a movie for the first time, the scary parts aren’t so scary on subsequent viewings. But when I checked the screen, I saw that it wasn’t at all a scary scene.

“What’s the matter?” I asked my daughter.

“I just can’t watch this part,” she said.

“Why not?”

I could hardly believe her answer. Read the rest of this entry

A sticky situation. (And a tacky title.)

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At dinner one evening my sister noticed a small white glob adhered to her eight-year-old son’s cheek. She couldn’t understand how he got toothpaste on his face at dinner time.

“Wash that toothpaste off your face,” she told him.

“It’s not toothpaste,” he insisted.

“Then what the heck is it?” she asked. Read the rest of this entry

Speaking of that MBA child…

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When negotiations don’t work, there’s always this method…

It was time for me to start making dinner. My six-year-old asked what we were having. I told her sausage, potatoes, and corn or carrots. I even let her VOTE on corn or carrots. (She chose corn. Typical.) But then she decided she wasn’t a big fan of sausage and potatoes and asked if there were any other options. I did sort of feel like making tuna casserole since I had plenty of time for cooking, unlike some nights where sausage is the easy last-minute prep meal. So, I told her tuna was an option.

First she said, “Ohh, I don’t like that.”

I reminded her that she and her sisters always eat it up when I make it. Suddenly her eyes brightened as if remembering, so she wrapped her arms around my waist, squeezed me in a big hug, looked up at me with her beautiful green eyes, and said quietly but intensely, Read the rest of this entry

I predict an MBA in her future.

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Conversation between my husband and our six-year-old daughter:

“How can I have darker hair?”

“Well, some people dye it.”

“Can I dye my hair?”

“Maybe when you’re older.”

“Like seven or eight?”

“More like 18.”

“10?” Read the rest of this entry