I think I’ll walk down a different aisle.

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Sheets

I’ll take the stripey ones on bottom, if you don’t mind.

My daughter was helping me shop for a wedding present. The bride had registered at Kohl’s and I had a copy of her registry. I decided to buy a sheet set. When we got to the linen section, I handed the list to my daughter.

“Just read off the first few letters of the merchandise number,” I told her, “so I can find the right sheets.” I started down the sheet aisle. Behind me my daughter called out in a clear, loud voice, over and over, Read the rest of this entry

Where do they come up with this stuff?

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I told my oldest to get off the card table for fear she would bend it “out of shape.” Then the five-year-old looked at me quizzically and asked, “You mean, like a circle?”

In the bathtub tonight this same daughter was playing with a toy horse and had this to say about it: “This horse’s name is Rainbow. People don’t ride it, though, because it leaves a Read the rest of this entry

Children can be so tactful

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When my son was about six years old, he attended a prayer meeting with my mom and me for our American Italian Club.  Everyone had an opportunity to mention their intention, and my son decided he wanted to pray for his grandma, who was there with us. My  mom was smiling with pride until he added, Read the rest of this entry

You Know You’ve Overstayed Your Welcome When…

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Royal wave

Royal wave

I recently visited my daughter and four grandchildren, aged two to eight. When I left I went to each grandchild for a hug and kiss. When I got to the two-year-old I knelt down and hugged and kissed her. I rocked back on my heels as she gave me the royal wave of good-bye. How cute, I thought. Then she extended her little arm, Read the rest of this entry

Something fishy is going on here

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Fish for sale at the Albertcoup Market, Amsterdam

“I’m not dead yet!” (A little Monty Python reference for you.)

I was in the supermarket doing some food shopping. I turned my back for a second while I picked up a cooked chicken. When I turned around my four-year-old was stroking a fresh fish on the counter.

“Why were you stroking the fish?” I asked her.

She replied, “I wanted to see if it was real.”

“Was it real?” I asked.

“No,” she answered.

“I think it was,” I said.

“No, it wasn’t because I Read the rest of this entry

Don’t read this one if you’ve just eaten.

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With our fifth child, I stopped carrying a diaper bag around. I just stuff a diaper and a baggie of wipes in my purse. The problem with this is that I have only one diaper and if I use it, I sometimes forget to refill my purse before leaving again.

Well, this time we were at our cabin for the last time this summer and were eating out at a local restaurant. Andrew had eaten corn out of a can earlier that day and a lot of something else I can’t remember. We were all sitting down enjoying our burgers when Andrew ripped a loud one. For some reason I didn’t think anything of it; we just snickered a little bit and finished our meal. Read the rest of this entry

Funny stuff kids say

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English: Santa Claus with a little girl Espera...

My mom sent these to me in an email. This isn’t my normal fair for this blog, especially because we have no way of knowing if these stories are true (they probably aren’t), but, I have to admit, they are funny. I hope you think so, too.

Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a lecture on the devil. One said to the other, ‘What do you think about all this Satan stuff?’

The other boy replied, ‘Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It’s probably just your Dad.’

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Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, ‘Why is the bride dressed in white?’

The mother replied, ‘Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life.’

The child thought about this for a moment then said, ‘So why is Read the rest of this entry