A friend of mine posted this on facebook:
Can a two-year-old have aspirations to be a medieval executioner? She has a pair of toy pliers and is attempting to remove my toes while insisting that “it no hurt.”
“You be fine, Mommy. It no hurt.” Medieval torture rack (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
[Several minutes later...]
Now she is approaching with a Read the rest of this entry
My children were watching a cartoon movie. It was one that they’d seen before. As such, I was rather confused when my four-year-old daughter quickly covered her eyes during one part. Usually once they’ve seen a movie for the first time, the scary parts aren’t so scary on subsequent viewings. But when I checked the screen, I saw that it wasn’t at all a scary scene.
“What’s the matter?” I asked my daughter.
“I just can’t watch this part,” she said.
I could hardly believe her answer. Read the rest of this entry
I’m always unsure how to feel when my six-year-old daughter exclaims, “Oooh, you look pretty, Mommy!” when she sees me dressed up nicely to go out for some function or other. I simply choose to be flattered and cover her face with lipstick kisses rather than consider the implications of the surprise in her voice.
Most days I’m lucky if I remember to brush my hair. I don’t put on make-up, and I pretty much wear the same comfort clothes day after day until wash day. Yea, I’m a pretty sight. In fact, take a look. We’ll call this picture “before”: Read the rest of this entry
Here’s a follow-up to the Do NOT drink the tea! story.
This morning my darling, homicidal three-year-old instructed my husband to be a dragon. Fearing what would happen if he didn’t comply, he roared and clawed at the air. She then said, “Here’s some food for you,” and put a Read the rest of this entry
My daughters are into this vast series of fairy books where the bad guy is Jack Frost. My six-year-old drew me a picture of a few fairies (sounds girly enough, right?) and of Jack Frost. As she’s explaining the picture to me she said, “This fairy is holding a pile of Read the rest of this entry
Pouty (Photo credit: ‘Playingwithbrushes’)
For one thing, our six-year-old takes pouting to a whole new extreme. When we were all out and about and desperately hungry, we hit a drive thru. Evidently, it was not at our daughter’s restaurant of choice. She sat in her seat, silent, but wearing the puffiest lower lip imaginable. Then I actually saw her reach up and feel her lips to be sure they were in a downward position, lest she make some mistake in conveying her feelings on the matter!
But what’s even better was the night my husband tucked her in Read the rest of this entry
While at work on his birthday, a coworker asked my husband how old he was.
“Forty-seven,” my husband said glibly, choosing an age far enough from the truth so as to be an obvious lie.
“Wow, you look good for your age,” the coworker replied. “You don’t look a day over 40!”
“I was joking,” responded my husband drily. “I’m only Read the rest of this entry
The caption on this photo was “Biggest Butt Ever!” That’s so rude to have taken this picture, but at least he didn’t say it out loud!
While we were living in an apartment, we didn’t know many of our neighbors, as I was one of the few stay-at-home moms around during the day. We did come to recognize many faces, though, even though not personally acquainted. One of these familiar faces belonged to a very heavy woman, whom my husband and three-year-old son found themselves standing behind in a grocery store check out line one fateful day. Read the rest of this entry
I recently visited my daughter and four grandchildren, aged two to eight. When I left I went to each grandchild for a hug and kiss. When I got to the two-year-old I knelt down and hugged and kissed her. I rocked back on my heels as she gave me the royal wave of good-bye. How cute, I thought. Then she extended her little arm, Read the rest of this entry